09.04.08
When dreams are warnings….
Monday and Tuesday night I couldn’t sleep and when I finally dozed off, I tossed and turned with nightmares and kept waking up in a sweat and repeating the dreams, until I got up at 2 or 3 and took a shot of rum to knock me out.
I’ve never had to drink to get to sleep before.
I’ve never had such powerful angry nightmares that were consistently full of fear and powerful warnings and rage.
The dream would repeat in waves and in different locations and in multiply ways but the premise was always the same – the outcome different only once.
He attacked me. I fought back and hurt him badly.
Either he came at me over the poker table, or across the back yard, or through the café. Either he swung at me with a pool cue, threw coffee or poker chips or words.
But every time I would lunge or duck or kick.
Every time my guys would rush to my defense but I beat them to it and would pin him down, put a choker hold, kick his balls, throw him against the wall, and once I tossed him over the fence into the neighbor’s yard even though he is stronger than I am.
All except once.
When he came at my friend from across the café and I stood up to block his path he put a knife into my right side.
And the dreams ended.
But I have the answer to which I’ve struggled for months. He has always unsettled me and I could never put my finger on it. My intuition has kept him at arms length – a suspicion I could not voice, a feeling I could not name. All I could ever say is, “Something isn’t right. Something isn’t on the level.” People didn’t believe me. No one else sensed it or could feel it.
But my intuition has never let me down. I have let it down from time to time and always to my own regret.
So I will listen this time and keep my distance.
