A Slave to Cheese.

In November of 2004 I participated in Nanowrimo.  I locked myself in the house – pretty much the same spot on the couch for 28 days and wrote a book.  I had no idea what I’d write about until the morning of the 1^st and then I just let the characters carry me off on a grand adventure.  The first week everything went fine.  I had no serious trouble making my daily word count.  Then about 8 days in, I stumbled.  When you stumble even for a day, the word count piles up – three days and you begin to think you’ll never make it, there’s simply too much to be written.  Panic sets in and you find yourself craving things you normally never eat, talking to characters that aren’t really there and walking in circles around the growing laundry mountain.

During my first Nanowrimo I developed a craving for Ritz crackers and Easy Cheese.  The unhealthiest ingestible-plastic product in the world and yet over the month I ate a full box of Ritz and TWO cans of cheese.  I craved dry ramen noodles, Godiva ice cream, and 4lbs of whole bean coffee.

I managed to finish in 26 days, with a word count of something like 50,163.

TA-Da!

So it’s no surprise to me that as I’ve gotten down to crunch time, I’m behind schedule and needed something, but I couldn’t name it… until I found myself standing in the store staring up at the canned cheese.  I walked away going – “No! I wont do this to myself.  No, I do not need plastic and dairy and OH MY GOD – I’d love some wheat, bread – YES English muffins!!!”

I went back.  I loaded my basket with my comfort writing foods to push for deadline.  Ritz, Easy Cheese, Godiva, and a bag of English muffins.  All the way home I was loving/hating myself.  I binged on rubber-cheeselike product and then suddenly got a second wind and wrote my entire page count for the day, in a matter of and hour and a half.

What does this mean?

I don’t know and I don’t really want to pursue the possibilities.

I’m still behind schedule, but now I have a cupboard of writing foods. 

As it gets down to the pressure cooker of deadline time, I’m also realizing who my Crazymakers are.  I’m coming face to face with the ‘Zilla I become when the pressure starts and I’m also in the midst of planning my hermitage that will last possibly for the next thousand years as I want to crawl under a rock and never see another living person so long as I have internet access.

When I’m discovered sometime in the future, I’ll look something like Golem – hideous and feral stroking an empty cheese can and murmuring “My Precious.”