Welcome to the family

Welcome to the world, Mark Alexander. Welcome to the wonder and the chaos.  You arrived this morning a little over 8lbs. and nine hours of labor. And we are all excited to have you.

I’m your Auntie Nina.  I’m the Auntie that everyone talks about while rolling their eyes, or coughing a curse about or the shaken head that implies, “now what has she done?” I’m that Auntie, and I hereby welcome you to the coolest most dysfunctional family I’ve ever met. 

We don’t put the “fun” in Dysfunctional but we are certainly entertaining.  Let me tell you a little about what you just got yourself in to from your Father’s side. 

Your Auntie D will always love you even when you’re cranky and belligerent.  She might not SAY it with words but she’ll cook you a mean stack of pancakes, and always offer you a place to feel at home.  She’s the no-nonsense Auntie with Kleenex, and a sturdy presence and whether she means to or not, she acts as the tree of our crazy unit, offering roots and wisdom and shade.  She may get exasperated, or roll her eyes but she’ll never turn away from you when you are in need.  That’s how she says, “I love you”.

Uncle Bert, doesn’t just march to his own drummer – he’s the whole freaking percussion section of the band.  He charges, bulldozes and looks threatening – but I have a little secret for you – he’s actually very tame.  He’s one of those cases of a man of steel with a heart of gold.  Sometimes he gets fooled by his own act, but he usually comes around, just give him a minute.  The thing about Bert is that he will always – despite the repercussions to his safety, defend his family. That means you now, Mark. He’s the earth and stones of our family unit.  He’s also good man and if you ever need help, he will offer it no strings attached, that’s how he says “I love you.”

Auntie Pha is the eclectic vibrancy of the bunch.  She’s the one most likely to grab you and hug the breath right out of your lungs.  She’s also the one most likely to cry at ‘Beaches’.  She can be difficult to understand, but if you are ever confused – just ask and she will happily explain it to you.  She is always at the ready with open arms and a willing ear.  She is the vine of wild morning glory winding its way through our unit. Auntie Pha will tell you verbally and frequently how much she loves you. 

I was born after Pha and I don’t know what I’d be in the family unit but I’m the one most likely to teach you how to swear, smoke and probably when you’re older – explain the opposite sex.  I’m the one most likely to go off gallivanting or tell wild yarns about some adventure or another.  I’m also the one most likely to plaster your picture on the world wide web and tell all sorts of embarrassing information to the general public.  I try to always be there for people I love, I try to remember to see the good as much as possible – even if that means I have to flat out lie to myself sometimes.  I try to keep an open mind to things and be flexible.  I will try to remember to tell you verbally how much I love you, but likely I will forget your birthday, and I’ll probably rarely remember Christmas, but if you are ever in doubt of my love just be aware I say “I love you” by offering to take you for a drive, go get coffee, go to a movie or just hang out and talk.  I have to work to be affectionate as far as hugging goes, but I think I’m getting better.

Uncle Jacer, is on a journey many of us don’t comprehend so he might be away for awhile.  But Jacer is sensitive and loving and if you want for anything in his power to provide – he will willingly and lovingly give it.  He will not judge you, nor hold against you any wrongs.  He’s forgiving but requires a tempo that allows him to come and go, so I liken him to the wild stag that graces our family, for short moments of time before wandering back into his woods.

Tys, is your dad so I’ll leave the you to learn about him on your own.  But this much I can say, be gentle on him.  You’re his first born so he’s going to do a lot of things right – maybe too right.  He’s going to do a lot of things wrong.  It’s the nature of parenthood.  Go easy on him , okay?  He’s generous, and will always do his best to make you happy.  To our family he’s much like the breeze that ruffles the grass and leaves of our gathering reminding us to breathe and be thankful for life.  

Uncle Feffo, is the uncle most likely to teach you all the things you ever want to know about chemistry, and adventure.  He will always watch out for your safety while allowing you to teach yourself about the dangers of the physical world. He will usually be the first to laugh at himself and encourage you to join in on the joke. Feffo will always offer himself in any capacity to those he loves.  He is loyal and full of spirit and is like the stream that waters our family unit, bubbling and full of enthusiasm and eagerness for experience.  If he ever sees that you are down, or stressed he will off you a hug or a night of talking or ask you if you want to shoot his rifle, this is how he says, “I love you.”

Grandpa Craig is full of warmth and the desire to make those around him feel loved.  He will reach for you when you are lost and lull you to sleep at night with stories. He is sun, which sometimes tends to shade behind clouds but when he tries, he can shine and set us all to growing.  He will usually tell you verbally he loves you, but more frequently, he will rest his hands on your shoulders and say, “Have I told you about the time…” this is how he says, “I love you.”

Lastly, I can tell you about my mother.  This is difficult because I don’t really know her.  I lived with her for 18 years of my life and I can’t say I’ll ever know her, but you will meet her at some point so I’ll do my best to impart something of value.  Your Grandma, your Father’s mother is driven.  If nothing else can be said, she is determined.  She sets her own courses.  Most people don’t know why she travels the routes she chooses or makes the choices she does, but when she wants to get somewhere – she usually finds a way. Her moon is the unconscious tidal force of our unit. 

We are creatures of our parents and our world and though her actions are rarely understood, the repercussions are far reaching and create a force that tends to bend our glade to an unconscious level of reaction.  This sometimes binds us closer and sometimes pushes us apart, but don’t fear little Mark Alexander, no matter the harmony of our glade, we will always love you. We always love each other, even when we are screaming angry, stuttering mad or aloof and distant – Love is a factor of our family that cannot be altered. 

Noogie, loogies, knuckle punches, stolen olives, “borrowed clothes”, lost keys, ruined artifacts, misplaced possessions, and infuriated swearing are always counterbalanced by – hugs, laughter, shared stories, happy screeching, tickle fights, de-pants wars, bloody games of spoons, make-up swaps, and hand-me-down favorites, family breakfasts, picnics, Holiday dinner, movie nights and “picking”.

What I mean to say is that family is a complicated dynamic.  Sometimes it’s great and sometimes you have to work through things, and sometimes you need a vacation – on the other side of the world. 

Ultimately family, to me anyway, is a blessing –  I can’t say life with our bunch will be easy but I can guarantee, it won’t be boring. We all love you Mark.  Welcome to the light.