A conversation I had with Admiral Fubar this weekend.
“So… have you found a certain man or someone back there in Portland?” He wondered.
“Nope. I haven’t been dating or even really left the house much.”
We talked a bit about my colossal bad year of attempted dating and my apparently poor judgment in men. I have always liked to believe I’m an excellent judge of character – evidently, not so much when is comes to men.
After we rambled about all this failure I said, “Oh, and you remember that guy Lionheart? The best night of wild I’ve ever had like four years ago and then two years later he shows up in Portland?”
“Yeah. I remember him. Whatever happened to him?” Admiral Fubar asked.
“Well, he was in Portland as of late August or early September, I think, and then he had a manic episode and his family picked him up and took him back to Colorado. I found out yesterday that the reason I haven’t been able to get ahold of him is because he’s in jail. For the next 3 years. FOR ROBBING A BANK! So yeah. I sure know how to pick ‘em. Computer hackers. Alcoholics. And now felony bank robbers. Go me.”
“Athena, I don’t know how to say this, and I’ve been meaning to try and tell you somehow…”
My heart leapt into my throat at all the possible endings to that statement.
“… sometimes you have really high standards for men. You just have really high expectations for guys.” He finished.
I started laughing and could only talk between breathes.
“I agree that I have high expectations but seriously – I can do better than a guy who thinks it’s a good idea to rob a bank – don’t you think?”
“Okay, maybe I picked a poor time to bring up that particular argument….”
And then we were both laughing.
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